You can use this same strategy when you’re frustrated or angry with other people because they didn’t do what you thought they should do. If you try it, consider the costs and benefits to the person of following or breaking the “should,” or rule. You might discover that that person has good reasons (even if you don’t agree with those reasons) for doing what he wants to do. Once you become aware of your tendency to interpret things in particular ways your thinking traps you might blame your anxious mind for working this way.

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